In the spirit of honesty (which I’ve always tried to apply to my blog) I’ve been sitting here wondering how to adequately articulate how frigging aggravating the perimenopause is and how crap I feel without sounding like I’m droning on yet again.
I was going to list my symptoms (many and varied) and moan about how difficult I’m finding them. Like the fatigue that meant I couldn’t drag myself around TKMaxx without having a sit down on every available velvet chair. Or the random bursts of weeping I have, sometimes for very understandable reasons, and quite often not. The fact I’ve had to give up chocolate because of my headaches (I mean come on as if this wasn’t unfair enough).
Then I thought about lightening the entry by detailing the time I couldn’t think of a media reference I was scrabbling for and ended up mentioning a TV show from the 80s by accident (to which my boss asked if I wanted “a Marathon while I was at it?”). Or the fact I was writing a policy for my job and had to google the word ‘discrimination’. I work in HR. Or the leadership meeting where I couldn’t remember the word “honorarium” and had to turn to the CEO for help. Or the fact I just had to look up the word “honorarium” again.
I filled in a form to request a GP appointment, which asked me to list my symptoms. I forgot to include the symptom where I keep forgetting stuff.
Anyway I’m going to steer this to the semi-positive. We have set up a support group at work full of flipping lovely women who understand how weird it makes you feel. I’ve nearly got to the end of Davina’s book which (despite me flinging it across the room periodically because of how unfair the examples all are) is pretty helpful. I had a phone GP appointment with a doctor who was absolutely lovely, sent me really useful articles and an app, and set up a face to face appointment for next week. Paul has ordered a Mediterranean cookbook because apprently sardines are worth considering. We traipsed round the far too big supermarket this morning so the fridge is full (not of sardines). I’m doing something about this rubbish, or at least trying to.
I don’t feel positive. I feel negative and overwhelmingly tired. So the above paragraph will have to do for now.